CHAPTER 5

Elaine woke up to Toni crying for her 7am bottle. With a groan she got out of bed, went over to the crying baby, picked her up and patting her back to sooth her, she took her downstairs before she woke Sam up.

Passing the hall mirror Elaine caught a glimpse of her face. God, she looked awful. Elaine hadn’t fallen asleep until at least 5am. - Her eyes were puffy from crying, with dark circles underneath, and sunk back in to her head She had never seen herself look like this before, but there again she had never spent hours crying before! Elaine had never been hurt like this before.

Stop it! Stop it! Elaine though angrily, as tears threaten to spring up again ‘don’t cry’, she said to herself, ‘He isn’t worth it’, and in sad desperation she accepted, that no matter how much her head repeated’ he isn’t worth it’, it would be some time, before her heart accepted it.

She had a lot to do today, too much to do, to cry over a worthless man, she thought. Get busy! By the time Elaine had fed, washed, and changed Toni, Sam had woken up, demanding his breakfast.

Elaine busied herself with the daily routine of getting Sam washed, changed and fed, keeping an eye on the time. Waiting till the shops were open, so that she could put her plans of the night before into action.

Elaine had decided that her first job was to ring a solicitor and make an appointment. She had found a local solicitors number in the yellow pages. Then she would go to the shops. The first port of call would be the post office, to get stamps so she could post the letters. Then the bank, to check on how much was in their joint account.

Elaine planned on drawing out five hundred pounds, which was the limit the bank allowed in one transaction a day. Then she would open an account in her own name. Transfer the rest of the money, from their joint account, into her new account, but leaving a hundred pounds in the joint account. Doing it this way, Elaine hoped that Colin wouldn’t realise too quickly that Elaine had all their money. Giving her access to hard cash, the she so badly needed.

After that, she would go round to Teresa’s, catch her up on what had happened and ask her to look after the children, while she went to pick up firstly the car, then the caravan.

At last! Nine o’clock came around, Toni was asleep in her pram, ready for her outing, and Sam was playing with his cars. Elaine rang the solicitor and got an appointment for the following Tuesday. Elaine was half hoping it would be for that day, but even though she knew it was unrealistic, she was still a little disappointed about the long wait. Tuesday seemed such a long time to wait, but there wasn’t anything Elaine could do about it. The receptionist who took her call had found a cancellation as it was, and really could not bring her appointment forward, but she had taken Elaine’s mobile number and promised if there was a cancellation, she would ring Elaine, and try to fit her in earlier than Tuesday.

Elaine put on her coat, and then Sam’s, and pushed the pram out of the door. Walking briskly to the post office, she purchased the stamps and posted the letters, listening as they fell to the bottom of the post box. ‘No turning back now,’ she thought. Bank next!

She wrote the cheque out for £500 cash, which was the banks upper limit for withdrawing cash without notice. Then enquired how much was left in the account. The woman behind the counter wrote on a piece of paper and pushed it through the opening at the bottom of the window. Elaine asked her, how she went about opening an account, in her name only. The woman gave her a book on current accounts, with a form on the back, which needed to be filled in.

Elaine took the form over to the small kiosks, which gave a modicum of privacy. Filled in the form, and then looked at the slip of paper in her hand; £700, remained in the joint account. Elaine wrote a cheque out to herself for £600 which she would use to open an account in her own name. Altogether she would have £1,100 pounds in cash, provided Colin did not twig before the cheque cleared. That would give her something to live on whilst her social security was getting sorted out.

Returning to the counter, she handed over the form, with the cheque. The woman processed the form and cheque, informing her it would be less than a week for the cheque to clear, and for a cheque book and paying in book to be sent out to her. If the woman had any suspicions at all, she didn’t show it. Elaine would return later and remove her name off the joint account, but not yet! She didn’t want to arouse Colin’s suspicion. With her letters posted and bank sorted out, she then headed for Teresa’s house.

Teresa wasn’t surprised to see her friend Elaine walk up the path, they saw each other most days. Teresa had a daughter Clare, who was Sam’s age, and a little boy Aden, who was two years younger. Clare went to the same school as Sam; both children were also in the same class. In fact that is how Teresa and Elaine, first met, when Teresa, took Clare to nursery school. Whilst waiting for their respective children to come out of nursery class the two women quickly struck up a firm friendship.

What did surprise Teresa when she opened the door to the knock was how Elaine looked. Immediately it was apparent that all was not well with Elaine, she was not her usually bubbly self. It looked as if she hadn’t slept for a week. Her face was drawn; eyes puffy and she had a worried look in her eyes. All of this Teresa took in, watching Elaine put Toni fast asleep in her pram, by the side of the stairs in the hall.

Teresa, didn’t ask Elaine what the matter was, much to Elaine’s relief, as she didn’t want to discuss it within Sam’s hearing. Instead, Teresa helped Sam off with his coat, asked Elaine to put the kettle on, while she took Sam upstairs to play with Clare. Raiding the biscuit tin, on the way past the kitchen, and collecting a couple of cartons of juice for each of the children.

By the time Teresa had come back down the stairs, the kettle had boiled and Elaine was pouring the coffee into the cups. Elaine knew her way around this kitchen, nearly as well as she did her own. Teresa picked up her cup and led the way into her living room, shutting the door after Elaine.

Once they were both seated, Teresa looked at Elaine, ‘Whatever, is the matter? You look as if someone has been run over?’ Teresa was aghast, as soon as she spoke the words, ‘Oh no! Not Colin, he hasn’t had an accident?

‘No, no, it is Colin, but not that, no accident, he is okay’. Then Elaine broke into sobs that racked her whole body, her hand pressing into her mouth trying to stop the sound or her crying.

Teresa hurried to where Elaine was sitting, and putting her arms around her, shushing and patting her back as she would have done if it was her young daughter. Rocking Elaine, backwards and forwards in an attempt to comfort her friend, all the time, wondering what on earth had happened to make Elaine cry so. It must be something really bad, whatever it is. Teresa knew she wouldn’t get any sense out to Elaine until the crying had stopped, so she just let Elaine cry it out. When Elaine’s sobs had subsided a bit, she passed Elaine the box of tissues, made her have a drink of her coffee, before saying, ‘Now tell me, what has happened?’

Between her sobs, Elaine told Teresa all about the phone call from the woman, or rather what she remembered of it, and the fact that she had gone through everything she could think last night, trying to pin point something, that would have give her clue to the fact that Colin was having an affair. She told Teresa that she had analyzed every conversation, and every move, that Colin had made. And found nothing, absolutely nothing, that she could have picked up on.

Every now and again Teresa interrupted her to ask clarification, on a remark the woman had made, or to say - ‘Oh no!’ the disbelief showing in her voice, her expression, one of shock. ‘Colin! Who would have though it…..? Colin,’ shaking her head in disbelief, when Elaine had finished. ‘Are you sure this woman wasn’t trying to wind you up….? It’s hard to believe Colin would do that to you? He thinks the world of you and the kids……... Remember last weekend, he was chasing you round the field with a water pistol, messing about with you as usually.’ I even said to Ken, look at them two acting like two kids, just starting out’, you never act like that with me’.

‘Well I’m the proof, it doesn’t mean a thing if he did! …. No, this wasn’t any wind up. I believed her! … Besides if it was, she would have called back and let me know and she didn’t…….. Am I going crazy Teresa…..? You have seen us together. Was there something you noticed that I might have missed........? Be honest?’ Elaine implored her friend, with all the anguish she felt showing in her face, as she looked intently at Teresa.

Teresa shook her head, for what seemed like the hundredth time that morning, as she looked sympathetically at her friend. ‘No, Elaine you haven’t missed anything! From what I have seen over the years I’d have staked my life on it…… Colin loved you! It takes some believing that he has been carrying on with a woman for months…… I bet she has made out it was more than it was! You know a quick drink; into a full blown affair….Where is she from this woman?’

‘She’s from Stoke…..I’ve been round that one, no its been four months she said…..Remember what I was like four month ago…..sick as a dog all the time and kicking off with false labour every couple of days.? Colin probably got sick of it and then decided to go elsewhere.

‘I don’t believe that, he wouldn’t deliberately, decide to go out and have an affair. I bet she has done all the running; lets face it your Colin is a catch! Good job, nice looking, good personality, she could be after a meal ticket!!..... Some women are like that you know, and were there are bad woman there are always men that will have a fling with them. He won’t be the first man, Elaine who has done that, and he won’t be the last.’

‘Well, he is the first man that has been married to me, that has done that! And I will tell you one thing Teresa; I’m not having him back!’ Elaine looked at Teresa with the defiance and determination she had felt the night before, when she had made up her mind that she was going to end her marriage. ‘I am finishing what he has started….I will make him live to regret it…..If he didn’t want me , he should have said so, told me, asked for a divorce…I would have given him one! I wouldn’t have kept him tied into a marriage with someone he didn’t want or love. I don’t believe in this, staying together for the sake of the children. I would have let him go!’

‘Have you though this through Elaine?’ Teresa said, looking now, just as worried as her friend did, ‘It’s going to be hard bringing up two kids on your own. I know you are angry and hurt and you have every right to be. If you had enough money to manage living without him, just you and the kids, Id says the same…. To hell with him….But you haven’t and I wouldn’t be your friend, if I didn’t tell you to think it through properly, don’t act rashly …….So think, before you do anything, your marriage is strong and I am certain Colin loves you……You could just give him a hard time, don’t make it easy for him for god sake, but still remained married to him, and then try in time to patch things up….. Have you thought about that?’

‘I’ve thought about things all night, cant you tell, look at me?’ Elaine gave a small ironic laugh. ‘No, I’ve decided I can’t live with Colin anymore! Every time he is away, I would be wondering what he is up too…..I wont live like that Teresa, it would kill me wondering that all the time!

Elaine’s eyes started to fill up again with tears. Teresa put her arms round her friend, ‘Okay, you do what you have too, if you need me for anything you know where I am,’ and gave Elaine a hug. ‘Right, lunch time, you stay there and I will make some dinner for us and the kids and after dinner, we will talk about what you are going to do’.

‘Oh I already know that one!’ said Elaine ‘thanks for the offer of lunch. I will tell you all about my plan!! After we have had it and the kids are playing back upstairs’ Elaine clapped her hand and smiled a triumphant smile at Teresa, as Teresa walked out of the room into the kitchen.

Teresa busied herself preparing sandwiches for her, Elaine and the children, still thinking of what Elaine had told her. Teresa was truly shocked by the news of Colin’s affair. She had been telling Elaine the truth, when she had said that in her opinion Colin loved Elaine. Out of all the couples that she knew, she would have thought Elaine and Colin would have always been together. Any fool could see they were happy…….It just goes to show you don’t know what is around the next corner. A puzzled expression showed on Teresa’s face, ‘I wonder what Elaine is on about, her plan, well I will know soon enough I expect.

Colin was a bastard doing that to her. Teresa knew that Elaine didn’t have any family living in the area. Elaine had moved to St Asaph because of Colin’s job, all her family were miles away; to far away to be of any really day to day help. I will do whatever it takes to help and support Elaine she thought. Teresa knew that Elaine would do the same for her.

Teresa shouted through to Elaine, that lunch was ready and Elaine went upstairs to get the children. With luck they would get a chance to have lunch before the baby woke for her feed at 2pm. The weather was picking up too, perhaps the kids could play in the garden after lunch and the baby could go to sleep in her pram out there as well. Leaving her and Elaine in peace to discuss what Elaine needed to do next and how she could help.

Both Elaine and Teresa kept conversation to normal everyday things and including the children during lunch, stimulating a semblance of normality which neither of them felt for the children’s sake. Neither of them seemed to pick up that anything was wrong with their respective parent.

Lunch over, faces washed, coats back on and Clare and Sam were playing out in the garden. Teresa was just finishing washing the last of the dishes, while Elaine finished changing Toni’s nappy before settling her down for her afternoon nap.

Teresa was walking into the living room with a coffee for each of them, when Elaine came back in from the garden after putting Toni’s pram outside.

‘Now, what is this plan you have’ said Teresa, putting a cup of coffee on the table in front of the chair where Elaine wearily sat down on.

Elaine proceeded to tell Teresa her plan! That had come to her the night before, getting more animated as she explained it to Teresa. Teresa shook her head in amazement, she had always known Elaine had a good head on her shoulders, but as Elaine’s plan unfolded Teresa knew this time her friend had surpased herself. Elaine’s plan was brilliant!

By the time Elaine had finished Teresa was smiling at the delight on Elaine’s face at her plan!

‘Can you imagine the look on Colin’s face when he finds the car missing, no money in the bank, the caravan gone and the locks changed on the door?’ asked Elaine.

‘I can, but think on, if you do all of that you will drive Colin away forever, do you really want to do that? Cautioned Teresa.

‘I don’t care if I do’, stated Elaine bitterly, ‘I couldn’t live with him again Teresa, I really couldn’t it would drive me mad wondering what he is up to all the time. I can never trust him again, never. So the way I am looking at it, I will get enough money to tide me over until benefits are sorted and at least this way I get my own back! The person who said revenge is sweet was right! Because that’s what I am going to do get my revenge!!

Teresa, saw the anger in Elaine’s face and nodded her agreement. There was no way Elaine was going to take this lying down and she was no where near ready to even think about forgiving Colin. Taking all of that into consideration Elaine’s plan was a good one, it would provide for her and the kids for the time being.

‘Right, what do you want me to do? I will do everything I can to help you’.

Elaine stood up and went over to give her friend a hug. ‘I was counting on you saying that, so thank you for being you!

‘Some friend I would be if I didn’t ‘Teresa retorted returning Elaine’s hug. ‘So, come on, what can I do?

‘Would you look after the kids for me? I have to go to the factory, get Colin’s car, then go and hitch the caravan up and take both over to Preston to my brothers. If I do that then I can leave the car and caravan with him, and he can sell them for me. He will also lend me another car to use. I can do all of that tonight while the kids are in bed, do you think your Ken would look after your kids, so you can come round and look after mine?’

‘Yes, I will explain to Ken , he will be okay, he wont like what Colin has done to you, remember Ken went through a similar sort of thing before he met me.’

It was arranged that Teresa would come round to Elaine’s at 7.30pm that night, Sam and Toni will be in bed then. Elaine would then go up to Preston. The two friends had estimated that it would be about 12.30am before Elaine would get back from Preston, but at least that part of the plan would have been carried out. The quicker Elaine’s brother could sell the car and caravan the better. Elaine would then be able to buy a much needed car of her own out of the proceeds; her brother would find her one.

‘Look at the time, its 4 o’clock already, and Id better get these two home. I still have to give my brother a ring to let him know I will be round tonight and why, that’s going to take a bit of time to do’.

Elaine rounded up Sam, put her coat on and pushed the pram out of Teresa’s back garden; Teresa reassured Elaine that she would be there at 7.30pm as promised. Elaine hurried home to ring her brother.

CHAPTER 4

Sam had finally gone to bed in the small bedroom next to Elaine’s, and the baby was asleep in her carry cot in the living room, to young yet to be put upstairs.

Elaine was weary, no matter how hard she tried to stop herself, tears kept welling up in her eyes. When she thought of the future without Colin, a sense of panic and desperation filled her… a fear that she had never known before. What was she going to do without him? Elaine in the hours that she had to think, after putting Sam to bed, knew in her heart of hearts, she could never trust him again! Never look at him again, without hearing that woman’s voice! And she knew she could never ever make love to him again! She shuddered at the thought, even if she lived to the rip old age of a hundred!

Then her heat ached, when unbidden, a though came into her head, of the many nights she had spent cuddled up to Colin’s warm body, and feeling his arm pulling her towards him, even when he was asleep Colin had wanted to be near her. The times when he had woken up, kissed her gently to wake her, arousing her slowly, so that her body was aching for him… Shaking her head to get the thought out of her mind, Elaine mentally gave herself a reprimand, for being daft enough to be thinking such thoughts now.

They had been so good together, why would he have risked that? Why hadn’t she picked something up to warn her? Surely there must have been signs! But for the life of her, Elaine could not remember Colin’s attitude or his behaviour changing towards her. She went over and over the last four months, analysing every word. Every touch, there was nothing! There really was nothing, to pick up.

How could he have been having an affair, and been so callous, as not even to feel guilty about it? Elaine surmised that it was the guilt, that would have showed or made Colin act differently, but he had not!! So he didn’t even feel guilty, that he was cheating on her behind her back, and abused the trust she had for him.

The though of Colin’s infidelity tormented Elaine, she could actually feel a physical pain in the stomach as if a knife twisted in her gut at the though of Colin making love to another woman. If she stayed with Colin she knew it would torture her. She could not cope with feeling like this all the time! She knew she would if she stayed with him….Elaine know there was nothing else she could do. Her marriage was over, she had to end it! She had no choice even if she felt as if she had lost everything she had!

She really had lost everything that the beam of sunlight had picked up this morning, her happy family! What did they say about people living in glass houses? Surely this is what she had been doing for months, even if she hadn’t known it.

Her world as she knew it had gone. Her mind was ticking over, trying to think how she was going to survive! And survive she must, she had to, because of Sam and Toni. She was dammed if some tart of a woman was going to go near her kids. I’d run a knife through her, if she came within a hundred miles of them she though. I’m dammed if I am going to see my kids go without because of that woman, and a man who had his brains in his trousers!

She stood up and paced the room, anger showing in every movement of her body, her eyes puffy and red with crying.

She had to end her marriage, if she carried on like this, it would make her ill. She would not let a man do that to her! She decided it would be for the best, for her and the kids to end their marriage! If she didn’t, she would turn into one of those women she despised. The ones that won’t let their husbands move without them being there, the ones that didn’t trust their husbands, watching every move they made. Elaine did not want to become one of those possessive, controlling women. Maybe if she had of been, this wouldn’t have happened! No far better to end it, she could not go on feeling as she did now.

Strangely enough, once Elaine had made the decision to end her marriage, the panic subsided… It was replaced by anger, which she had never known before. A cold anger, which brought with it a determination! A determination to get her own back! Revenge is sweet. It certainly was a day for new revelations, not only about Colin, but about her as well.

A determination to rise above this hurt and come out on top! The fear and desperation was still there, but she was able to push that to one side. Pretend that those feelings didn’t exist for the time being.

Take one step at a time, she thought, and get through tonight. Make a plan and get through tomorrow. Don’t think of what’s going too happened after tomorrow. Concentrate on the here and now. Make a plan! A plan that would hurt Colin, nearly as much as he had hurt her, a plan to ensure she had enough money for the time being, to feed the kids.

A plan that’s what she needed a plan! So stop this crying for Colin. Elaine chided herself, he defiantly isn’t worth it. After all who does that to someone they love, no one! Colin didn’t love her. She was buggered if she was going to cry another drop for a man that didn’t love her. Elaine’s thoughts carried on in this vein, talking her self into a better frame of mind. A frame of mind that she so badly needed, to enable her to act!

With a mental shake, Elaine stood up quickly from the settee. Defiance and determination in every movement, her face set showing her resolution. Elaine hurried into the kitchen to put the kettle on, yet another coffee, in case her resolve failed her. Before this night is through I will be swimming in the stuff.

While the kettle was boiling, she got out all of the bills to see how much she needed to shed and how much she needed to keep hold of, to manage her financial responsibilities. She had decided to go through them, and try to put some financial organisation at least, into this mess that Colin had made of their lives.

Coffee made, and back in the living room, she sat on the comfortable settee which was the colour of pale terracotta. It was the larger of the two settees’ that dominated the room, the baby’s carrycot stood to one side of it. The room was quite a sizeable room, with a large bay window, curtains reaching the floor, in rich terracotta to compliment the colour of the settees. With magnolia painted walls, which hung paintings that Elaine and Colin had acquired on their many holidays together. They both loved travelling and art, so there was quite a few painting in the room, giving colour to the plain walls. With a fire in the chimney breast, shelves with ornaments and photographs in one of the two alcoves, the TV in the other. The finishing touch was the warm terracotta carpet, making the room feel cosy and welcoming.

Elaine was going through her household bills, which were piled up on the coffee table, placed in front of the settee she was sitting on. A sinking feeling in her stomach, as she realised the amount of money she would need to pay the bills. How she was going to manage to pay all of this! Next week all of the big bills were due, the telephone, gas and electric.

On the positive side the council and water rates had just been paid, so at least she wouldn’t have to worry about them for another year. There was still over a year to pay on the car and caravan. Eighteen months on the new carpets they had brought when she found out she was carrying Toni, and another year to pay on the fire in the living room. She didn’t have a cat in hells chance of paying all of these! She didn’t have a job!

She hadn’t worked since Sam was 2 years old; even then she only worked sporadically once he was born, going back to her old job as a secretary, when they required additional staff. Elaine had not worked at all since they had moved to St Aspah. It was impossible for her to even look for work, with Toni being twelve weeks old. There were after school clubs for Sam, but at five, he was too young to face such a long day at school. Elaine realised it would be some years before she had any hope of returning to work. She leaned back on the settee, eyes closed, she was feeling tired, weary, utterly drained and she was feeling sickly too. She realised that she hadn’t had anything to eat since that phone call, the though of food made her stomach churn.

Christ, what use is she going to be to the kids, if she can’t afford to pay for the basics or the things in the house like carpets and the fire, let alone the mortgage! Tears rolled down her cheeks feeling helplessness. She was ill equipped to deal with this situation. Dam Colin!! If I live to be a hundred I will pay him back for doing this to me and the kids. What sort of a man does that! What a situation to be in, she couldn’t think of anything worse that could happen to anyone.

It would be okay for Colin, when she ended this marriage. He wouldn’t be left with all the bills to pay; she would have to pay them! All he would have to do is find somewhere else to live! It was not fair; she was not responsible for destroying their marriage. It wasn’t her, that couldn’t be trusted, but it would be her that suffered for it. Trying to pay bills, making ends meet… robbing Peter to pay Paul, so that she could manage to keep a roof over their heads and food in the cupboard. What a mess!

She would have to ring up tomorrow and put all the household bills in her name, because she would have to be responsible for them from now on. Her face showed the worry that the situation was causing her. Elaine pretty face was tearstained with frown lines showing on her forehead, a dejected worried look in her eyes, tears only a breath away, she folded her arms around her body hugging herself, to give herself some comfort, rocking back and forth, as she kept going over the list of bills over and over again and with no money to pay them.

From now on, she was responsible!! The thought kept repeating in her brain as she rocked back and forth on the settee, as if there was some significance to it! The way you do for one those brain teasers, you mull the question over and over in your mind until your brain starts turning, and finally hits on the solution. From now on!! She mussed, from now on!

Suddenly the penny dropped! The solution, going over and over in her mind, building up with momentum, her excitement mounting as she realised that she had finally got it!! Her way out!! She had got it! Oh yes indeed she had certainly got it!!

How she got the idea she didn’t know, but the idea would not only see her through the short term, give her a bit of breathing space, until she had the chance to sort out social security and the like. But, she would get her own back on Colin too!

Oh revenge is sweet Elaine though while she hugged her arms around herself, something verging on glee showed in her face, a small determined smile appearing her appearance changing as she formulated her idea. She would indeed show Colin that he would have to get up awful early to catch her out! Elaine actually smiled, as the thoughts crowded into her head.

She looked over at Toni who was sleeping in her cot, glancing at the clock. God was it that time already, time for the baby’s feed again. She decided she would make the baby’s bottle, feed and change Toni and once she had the baby settled again, and then start work on her plan! Make the germ of an idea into a practicality. She need to act and act upon this quick!! Before Colin suspected what she was up to. Oh yes! It was a marvellous idea, marvelling at the way it came to her out of the blue. Almost pure inspiration!

With her plan in her mind, Elaine got busy sorting out her daughter, so that she could start work. Every now and again shaking her head at her amazing idea, Elaine had even impressed herself, that she, had though of it. Colin wouldn’t know what had hit him. What was that saying? Hell has no fury like a woman’s scorn, must have been made for situations like this! Elaine actually chuckled, for the first time since that phone call. Elaine though, she could, if she played her cards right, get something out of this nightmare she had found herself in.

Elaine’s plan was so simple….She would write to the telephone, gas and electric companies, changing the bills into her name, as from tomorrow! Which meant, all of the past quarters bills would go to Colin, they were in Colin’s name! Colin would have to pay those bills! She would only be responsible for future bills, and as the bills were to be paid next week - Elaine would have another three months before she would have to worry about them being paid again! Genius! Pure Genius!!

Naively, Elaine was under the impression that at least she would have gone to court by then, and sorted out some maintenance money for herself and the children. She also contacted the Hire purchase companies, for the car, caravan, carpets and fire. These were also in Colin’s name, she would inform them that he has changed his address, and give them his mums address. Ask them to send the bills to him there.

Elaine wouldn’t have to pay for any of these, but still have them in her home the carpets and fire at least. They had paid over two thirds off them, and companies can’t reposes the goods if they were more than a third paid for! She clapped her hands in glee, as she thought of Colin’s face when he realised he would still have to pay these bills.

Now that Elaine’s mind was on that track, it carried on…. ideas forming in her mind. Car and the caravan! How could she get them! Her brain grasping at the whisper of a plan, of course! She could have them as well; the plan had formed in her mind.

The car was in the company’s car park, Colin used a company van for work, and he drove their car to pick his van up, and then left it in the car park. Elaine would usually get a taxi to pick the car up if she needed it.

All Elaine would have to do is go to Colin’s works tomorrow and pick the car up. The log book was in her name already, because when they had brought the car Colin was away, when they had brought the car and she picked the car up from the garage. Elaine had signed for it, and it was in her name, but the finance payments were in Colin’s name!

Elaine, also had the two sets of keys, the spare set was in the draw upstairs, and Colin left the other set in the security lodge in work in case she needed the car. She would have the car and Colin would still have to pay for it, because it couldn’t be reposed if he didn’t. There was more than a third of the car paid for; this would be the second year they had had that car and it was half paid for. Elaine laughed; oh this was starting to be fun!!

With the car sorted, Elaine turned her thoughts, to the caravan. With the car she could pick the caravan up and tow it anywhere she wanted too. Again the finance payments were in Colin’s name. There was only another 10 months to pay on it, again it couldn’t be reposed. All Elaine had to do was find a safe place to keep, both the car and caravan; until she could sell them.

She though of her brother Kevin, he owned a garage on the outskirts of Preston, she would take them there. Kevin could sell them for her. She knew once she had told Kevin what had happened Kevin, would help her sell them, and he wouldn’t let Colin anywhere near them. There would be no chance of Colin getting them back.

What’s next? Elaine ran through her ideas, bills sorted, car and caravan sorted; only one problem remained money!!! Hard cash!!! All she had in her purse was ten pounds and some loose change, that wouldn’t last till any money came from social security.

That is what she would have to live on from now on and god knows how much she will get from them. Elaine hadn’t a clue about benefits; the only one she had ever claimed was child benefit.

The bank! There was money in the bank!! Colin, only got his months pays a couple of days ago. Would she dare draw it out? It would give her some much needed ready cash; she would need some for petrol money if nothing else. It would keep her going until she had sorted out the social security and sold the car. Could she do this? Would her conscience let her? It would be stealing because she would no longer be with Colin, she didn’t have a right to his wages really.

Don’t be daft she chided herself. Why, should she have a conscience! Colin didn’t, otherwise he wouldn’t be carrying on with that woman. She did not have a right to his money, but the kids did, and she would need the money to feed the kids. Elaine decided that she would go to the bank tomorrow, and see how much money was in there, leave a hundred in for Colin and draw the rest out. She needed to leave sufficient money in the bank for Colin.

Elaine didn’t want him getting suspicious before he got home, she needed time to get the car and caravan, and go to the social security. Elaine, needed time to think of anything else that she had not thought about tonight, it would be better if Colin didn’t realise too quick, that Elaine knew about the woman and that she was going to end their marriage.

Elaine supposed she should book an appointment with a solicitor tomorrow as well

Right! I think I’ve though of as much as I can tonight, I will give Tressa a ring tomorrow and tell her what has happened and ask her to look after the kids. While I go to the bank, social security and get the car and caravan.

Teresa would do this for her, she had never let Elaine down, and in all the years she had known her. It will come as a shock to Teresa, nearly as much as it had shocked her. It was only last weekend her and Colin had been away for the weekend with Teresa, her husband and kids. Teresa knew her and Colin very well. Elaine knew her friend would look at her in disbelief when she told her about the phone call. Teresa trusted Colin too; she wouldn’t think that he could do such a thing.

Elaine felt her throat tighten again. Right, time to make a move, Elaine didn’t want to dwell, in case she started crying again. Get cracking; write to those companies, with a sudden movement of her arm, she reached for the bills. She put the bills on a pile, got some pen, paper and envelopes and wrote to each one.

An hour later the job was done; ending with a small stack of envelopes. First thing in the morning she would go to the post office, get some first class stamps and post them.

Elaine wearily, picked up Toni’s carry cot, and went upstairs to bed. Hoping now that she had sorted that bit out, at least she would be able to get to sleep and blot out the days events for a few hours at least. Elaine had had enough of thinking; she was totally exhausted, all she wanted to do was sleep, the sleep of oblivion.

CHAPTER 3

Susan put the phone down; the silence from the other end of the phone, had told her more than a barrage of screaming words ever could. Susan had hit home! The poor cow, didn’t have a clue, her dear hubby was playing away. She did now though!!!

There was no way; Susan was going to keep that one a secret!! Not after the treatment Colin had dished out to her….Servers him right she though. I hope I have scuppered that one good and proper! I have probably done the poor cow a favour, once a man was unfaithful to his wife he would always be, reasoned Susan. If Susan had, second thoughts about making that phone call, and the devastation she had just caused, she didn’t show it. She walked away from the public phone in the corridor, and as cool as a cucumber, return to her work area.

Susan had known Colin had been avoiding her, she wasn’t daft. Susan knew she had nothing to loose by making that phone call. As far as Colin was concerned he and Susan were finished and that’s why he was ducking and diving. Well Susan had just made it easy on him, as far as she was concerned, she had. Colin had got his way out, of the relationship he had with Susan, and with luck she had jeopardised his relationship with Elaine. Susan, didn’t want to see Colin again, that’s why, she made the phone call. Just as well she didn’t want to see him; he would probably kill her, after what she had just done!

Even after that first night together, Colin had made excuses, rather than seeing her. If Susan was honest with herself, she would have to admit, that it was only the fact that she had no other man in the pipeline, so to speak, that she chased after Colin. Life was boring; when you were entirely on your own, Susan thought she may as well have a bit of fun!

In Susan’s opinion, a man that was unfaithful to his wife was fair game. The majority of married men that claimed too, ‘not be looking’ when they frequented the Hotsy - were so looking, and Susan often told them so! Sometimes she wondered if it was her catch phrase, when she retorted, ‘ Awwwwwww, I got news for you buster, you are so, sooo, looking!’ drawing out the words, while looking coyly up at them, pouting her mouth, and making sure her body moved to emphasis her curves as she walked away. Always leave em gagging honey!

Susan conveniently forgot that it was her, which had instigated the, ‘one nightstand’ with Colin, in the first place. Even if it had crossed her mind, she would have reasoned, ‘well he went there, didn’t he? It takes two to tango!!’

Susan liked the chase, better than actually ‘being in a stable relationship’; she got bored with that sameness, which she would have found in a steady relationship. But at the same time, she sometimes, wanted nothing more than a steady relationship. Susan had tried a number of times to find the proverbial, ‘the one,’ without success. Something would always go wrong!

In all fairness it wasn’t always Susan’s fault that it did. Susan had a knack of picking the wrong man. If she had offers from 5 good men and one bad one, she would always choose the bad one!

It was a shame about Colin, because Susan had grown to like him. Susan over looked the fact that Colin was married for a time, and kidded herself into thinking that married men did have their advantages. After all, you didn’t have to clean up after them, they didn’t commandeer all of your time. If you had a date and they found out about it, well what could they say? - They had a wife at home!

The woman that believed that their married boyfriend didn’t sleep with his wife was deluding herself!! To right they did!!! They were also easy to get rid of, when you were tired of them and their constant moaning about how hard done by they were. All you had to do was threaten to tell the wife!! It was a case of now you see them - now you don’t!!

Then Susan made the mistake of getting more involved with Colin than she had originally intended. . For want of a better word she day dreamed of how it would be, if Colin was really hers. Sometimes, she tried to make the day dream into reality, coming back to stark reality soon enough, when Colin reminded her he was married. Just a pipe dream that is all it was.

After the first few dates, Colin gave up making excuse and Susan had looked forward to their time together and it was easy to forget he had a wife. Colin was a really nice man, not the usual sort that Susan went out with. He was considerate, even if he was married. He made sure that he remembered to tell her when he was coming into the area, arranging a time to meet her, even spending a bit of money on her. Taking her to good restaurants, then going on to a club afterwards and dancing the night away, and he could dance, that was a bonus. He wasn’t the standing at the side of the dance floor, watching type.

It was after his wife had the baby that Colin had started to avoid her and that hurt Susan, after all, what difference should a baby have made, to Colin playing away from home. None, none at all!! And Susan was enjoying their affair. But it did make a difference!! More and more Colin was avoiding coming in to Stoke.

What annoyed Susan, was that he didn’t say, that he didn’t want to see her anymore, not straight out , he just avoided coming to Stoke and didn’t answer his phone. The only way Susan found out that he was in Stoke, was by ringing the hotel on the nights he usually stayed there.

This hurt and annoyed Susan, she would have thought after all of the good times over the last few months he would have been straight with her. If he had of done, Susan might have acted differently, mightn’t have made that phone call to his wife.

Susan knew deep down, there was no substance to her relationship with Colin, his wife had too stronger hold over him, if he ever did leave his wife, Susan knew she would be second best and Susan wasn’t prepared to play second fiddle to anyone. Besides this, Susan wouldn’t trust any married man that played away from home, if they do that to one woman they will do it to them all!! Susan definitely didn’t want someone else rubbish.

So after yet another night without Colin turning up at his hotel and not answering his phone, she though sod it!! She had given Colin more than enough chances to come clean. Whatever will happen next, according to Susan, Colin has asked for!

At her lunch time break the next day, Susan made the call to Elaine, washed her hands of Colin for good and carried on with the rest of her life without a backwards glance!

Susan worked away, without even the smallest feelings of guilt for the part she had played in wrecking havoc on Colin’s family. After all if Colin had thought that much about them, he wouldn’t have entered into an affair with Susan, no matter what!! Colin’s family were his responsibility, not hers, she had enough problems of her own to deal with, let alone Colin’s and it was about time she moved on.

When Colin rang her ranting and raving as he would do, at some point within the next few days, Susan would take a leaf out of Colin’s book, and ignored the call.

.

SURVIVING

This is the first chapters of a book that I am currently working on. The title of the book is SURVIVING.

Comments will be welcome and the all of the following is protected by copy write to the author of this blog.

~SURVIVING~

CHAPTER ONE.

Elaine sat on a hard backed chair by the phone, the words, “hi there, can I speak to Colin”. Ringing in her ears and those few words seem to resound in her mind. The world had stopped, nothing moved, even the clock was silent, and the noise of child playing receded into the background until even that couldn’t be heard. It was seconds, or was it minutes? Before Elaine’s mind got past those words, the words that precluded the information the woman’s voice on the other end of the telephone gave her about her husband Colin, Colin, who was the father of her children, Sam who was five, Toni only a baby of twelve weeks. The man Elaine looked up to, the man that meant more to Elaine than life itself, the man that Elaine’s world began with and ended at, the man Elaine respected and trusted.

Trust!! Trust!! Over and over those words replaced the woman’s voice in her mind, I trusted him, and I believed in him, believed the words he spoke. How! can this be true, please god don’t let it be true, don’t let it be true. Why would the woman say that if it weren’t true? Why would she say those things, those things that had shattered her world completely?

Only this very morning the sun shone a bright beam of light, shining on the dark head of her son playing with his truck, passing over the carry cot that held her much wanted daughter and lighting up the picture on the shelf of her and Colin. In the picture Elaine was a petite blonde of eighteen, smiling happily, in her white wedding gown. Colin a man of twenty five, standing beside her, tall and handsome, was looking proudly down on her. That beam of sunlight shone on everything she held dear to her in this world and she had thought now at twenty five, I have everything, everything I have ever wanted. If I never get anything more out of this life except what I have at this moment I will be a happy woman.

Had someone being playing a cruel trick on her? Letting her think that! Then a couple of hours later shatter her world? That is what has just happened; my world has been shattered by a woman’s voice from the other end of the telephone, a woman she had never heard of and didn’t even know.

Elaine’s mind moved slowly tentatively on and she remembered saying, “No, not at the moment, can I give him a message?”

Can I give him a message! Had she really offered to do that? Elaine heard the laugh a strange high pitched laugh, with shock she realised it was her that was making this high pitched strangled sound, her hands moved to her mouth to make herself stop, pressing her hand hard on her mouth. Ironic she had offered to give a message to Colin. To her Colin! Tears ran slowly done her cheeks as her mind finally went to the dreaded words spoken by the woman, “yes please, could you tell him Susan has been held up and I will be late meeting him tonight.”

Elaine’s mind jumped, the memory of her next words coming in a rush, “Susan, Susan who?”

“Oh sorry, I though he would have mention me, I m his girlfriend, we have been seeing each other for about 4 months.”

Girlfriend! Four months! Elaine’s mind repeated over and over, the woman’s voice no longer heard. Colin the man she trusted, the man she would have given her life for. Had a girlfriend for four months! The information had finally sunk in, her mind slowly accepting the fact. This woman had really said she had been Colin’s girlfriend for four months! Breaking her world in to fragments, making her catch her breath and bend over in physical pain, one arm hugging her body, her other hand clasped over her mouth to stop the noise of the sobs that shook her body from head to toe from being heard.

Finally she looked down, expecting to see the phone still in her hands, but it wasn’t there, and it was on the floor making a high pitched noise, Elaine then realised she hadn’t switched it off. She looked round in a daze still reeling with the shock, surprised to see everything was the same. Some how she hadn’t expected this, she wasn’t the same and expected her small dining room to have changed with her, but it hadn’t and with absolute certainty realised she would never be the same again.

She slowly rose out of the chair putting her hand out to steady herself, she felt confused, empty, drained of every last drop of energy. What was going too happened to her and the kids, what was she going to do? Realisation dawned she was going to have to find the answer to that one quick, before that, that!!!!!!!! She couldn’t bring herself to say that woman’s name, before she told Colin that she had rung her.

Think! Think! What am I going to do?? She looked around the room wildly as if the room itself would give her the answers she desperately sought. I need to calm down; I need to be able to think clearly. Oh! What I am going to do! A cry of anguish escaped from her lips, she clamped her hand hard over her mouth to muffle the sound. I mustn’t cry again, I mustn’t!

Think! Please god let me think what to do!

Suddenly the dining room door burst open and Sam tumbled in, his chubby face and legs showing at five he was still not much more than a baby himself, shouting “Mum, Mummy the baby’s crying, and the cartoons have finished.”

Elaine kneeled down and pulled the wriggling Sam towards her, cuddling him tight, burying her head in his neck, feeling her son in her arms brought fresh tears down her cheeks, what’s going too happened to him? This little boy who depended on them to keep him safe from harm, Elaine would have clung to her son for longer, but Sam had over ideas.

“Mum the baby is crying” he said as he wriggled harder and escaped from her arms and turned to run through the door into the hall.

Elaine made a concrete effort to push the phone call and all thoughts relating to it out of her mind to concentrate on what her small son was saying.

She quickly glanced up at the clock on the wall before following him, she was half way through the door before she realised the clock had said five o’clock. Five o’clock, it had been just after 2 o’clock when that phone had rang, she had not long fed the baby and here it was nearly time for her next feed. Elaine had lost three hours out of her life; she shook her head, how long had she been sitting in that chair after the phone call? Three hours. Something inside herself turned like a steel bar on a door, never again will she neglect her children or loose three hours out of her life for a man, she vowed, and all the love she had felt for her husband turn to something she couldn’t quite put a name too yet, but it wouldn’t be long before she did realise what she did feel for Colin. What that phone called had turned her feeling of love for him into.

She walked quickly after her son to attend to her daughter.

Elaine could see Toni’s little fists waving about, legs kicking in her carry cot demanding attention. She picked the crying baby up, put her over her shoulder and she immediately snuggled into her neck, cuddling in as close to her mother as she could, this baby wouldn’t wriggle away from her like Sam did. Patting Toni’s back to sooth her, the baby soon stopped crying.

Elaine swayed from side to side to comfort her baby daughter. Why, why has he done this, put everything at jeopardy? She searched for the answer to the question, it was Colin that had wanted this child, and she Elaine was the one that thought Sam was enough. It was only when she saw how lonely Sam looked playing on his own and remembering her own childhood, filled with memories of brothers and sisters that she finally agreed to try for another baby. It was Colin who was disappointed month after month when she failed to get pregnant; it was Colin who persuaded her to go to see if there was anything wrong and went along for tests when they didn’t find anything wrong with her. In fact there was nothing wrong with neither of them it was just one of those things.

Finally after two years of trying her finally found out she was pregnant, Colin was ecstatic and when the scan revealed she was carrying a girl it was Colin who said his life was complete. “One for me and one for you,” he had said, picking her up and twirling her round kissing her soundly before putting her down. Well he was certainly right there, Sam thought the world of his Dad and this one always snuggled in to her.

Four months that woman had said Toni was only three months old; he had started to see her in her last month of her pregnancy, carrying his baby. She felt her stomach tighten as this fact caused her more pain, she turned her face into the babies head on her shoulder, trying to stem the tears that kept coming unbidden to her eyes.

Stop, stop she said to herself, I can’t let Sam know that anything is wrong until I have figured out what to do. Giving herself a mental shake, she sat down, changed the babies nappy, forcing a smile at her as Toni’s big blue eyes looked into hers, then when the baby smiled back her smile turned into a genuine smile of love and delight at this little person on her knee, for a brief moment forgetting the hurt that her husbands betrayal had caused her.

Toni was as different from Sam as a brother and sister could imaginably be, Toni was as blonde, as Sam was dark. Toni had long arms and legs with a slender body, her legs dangled when you had hold of her; Sam was stocky and well proportioned, with chubby arms and legs, Sam had dark brown eyes like Colin and Toni had Blue eyes like Elaine. Both were bright as a couple of buttons, even at three months old Toni had the look of being in this world before and quickly learnt how to get attention and there wasn’t much that Sam didn’t notice.

As if Sam had read the thoughts going through her mind he looked up from his crayoning book which he was colouring whilst sitting on the floor in the middle of the living room and asked, “why are you sad mummy, what’s wrong.”

“Me sad never! I was just thinking what beautiful children I have and how lucky I am to have you.”

Sam screwed up his face, looked straight into her eyes, lifting his little chin up and putting his head to one side, a look of disbelief in his eyes. “I think you’re sad, but maybe tea will cheer you up.” Then he gave such a cheeky grin that in despite of everything Elaine laughed, Sam and his belly, honestly where would she be without him. She shook her head, stood up still with the baby on her arm looking at her forever hungry son, who at five though food was the answer to most things and headed for the kitchen to make his tea and the babies bottle.

By six o’clock both children were fed, washed and ready for bed. Toni was put back into her carry cot in the living room, where she was hopefully to stay till her 10 o’clock feed after which Elaine would carry the cot upstairs when she went to bed putting the carry cot next to the double bed so she could hear her if she woke during the night and pick her up before she disturbed Sam.

Sam was choosing a story for her to read to him before he went to bed sitting on the floor in his pyjamas looking at the pictures on the cover of the books, he had only started school last September, Toni was born the following May, his reading skills were limited, but good for a child of his age. He would be going back into the second year of infants when School restarted after the summer break in about four weeks time. He looked so lovable with his face still shiny and his hair still damp from his bath, once again the hurt came over Elaine, and how he could do this, how? Sam’s sensed her looking at him, looked up and smiled, “when is Daddy going to ring?”

Elaine froze, panic setting in, how could she have forgotten. Colin always rang when he was away from home, which he was most of the time during the week. His job in IT took him all over the place visiting clients, assessing what their software needs were and advising them on the packages that would be most suitable for them. Colin rang twice every night, the first time to speak to Sam before he went to bed and later to speak to her once Sam was in bed and when the baby was settled. That would mean he would be ringing soon and she still didn’t know what she was going to do! She had been that busy seeing to the kids that she hadn’t had the chance to think.

The phone rang and before she could stop him Sam had jumped up, ran to the phone, picking it up she heard him saying “Hiya Daddy”. Her heart was going nineteen to the dozen, her legs were shaking and her breathing was short and shallow. For god sake pull you together she silently screamed at herself, this is Colin, you’ve known for years or had she? At this moment she didn’t feel as if she knew him at all. Her Colin wouldn’t have done this to her, but he had, he had.

What to do, what to do, her mind raced trying to fine the answer while Sam chatted happily to his father. Then out of the blue it came, the answer she was desperately seeking for. Do nothing, easy do nothing, act normal the chances are that woman wouldn’t have seen him yet, she said she was going to be late, so he wouldn’t know that she knew about his affair, act normal make some excuse why he shouldn’t ring her later on, say the baby was playing up all day, say that she was tired and was going to get some sleep while the baby was asleep. She knew Colin would accept this; it would give her the much needed time to think of what she should do.

As Sam finished chattering to his father he passed the phone to Elaine, I can do this, I can do this, Elaine said to herself as she put the phone to her ear. “Hi” she said into the mouth piece. “I can’t stop long, the baby has been crying on and off all day. I think she has colic”. Elaine marvelled at how normal her voice sounded as she glibly lied to the man on the other end of the phone and how easy it was to lie to him. She who had never lied to him in her life, well not about anything important anyway, only little lies that you tell to ensure someone didn’t worry about you, while they were away from home, saying she was fine when she had the flu, just little white lies like that.

Colin made sympathetic noises down the phone when he heard about the babies colic, then he informed her he hadn’t got to Stoke that night, he was stuck in Northampton, something about his client needing more information on the software package, told her he was staying at the same hotel as the night before, asked her if she still had the number so she could ring if she needed too and told her his room number. Elaine still had the number. Colin also told her that he wouldn’t be home till Saturday morning because of this delay, instead of Friday and that he was going to give his client in Stoke a miss so that he could drive to Manchester, stay there Friday night so he could be home early Saturday morning. When Colin had finished talking Elaine said, “Ok, oh there’s the baby again, I will have to go, don’t ring back later because if I get her to sleep I will go to sleep too while I get the chance.”

“Ok Hun, hope my little angel doesn’t keep you awake all night, take care and don’t forget I love you, bye for now”.

“Bye.” She didn’t add “I love you too,” as she usually did. Elaine put the phone down, anger stirring inside of her, I love you indeed, love does he really know what that is. Her hands clench at her sides she could feel the anger welling up insides of her. Yes she would think long and hard when Sam had gone to bed. It was Thursday today, by the time Saturday came round she would know what to do. Oh yes Mr Colin Ward I will definitely know what to do. Turning away from the phone, she went over to Sam who had chosen a book, picked up her son and sat him on her knee and started to read him is bedtime story.

CHAPTER TWO.

Colin put the phone down and stretched out on the hotel bed. God what a day! He though it would never end and when it did the deal still wasn’t signed. He cursed the delay; he was counting on his commission to whisk Elaine and the children away for holiday, before Sam had to go back to School... He mussed over the days events ticking things off in his mind, making certain he hadn’t forgotten anything and that tomorrows meeting would finally wrap up the deal.

Satisfied that he had done everything he could have done that day Colin’s mind turned to thoughts of home and surprising Elaine on Saturday by telling her that they could have a couple of weeks away in her favourite spot Port Merion. He knew White Horse Cottage was vacant, for a week, overlooking the beach that stretched for miles and miles, Sam would love it making sandcastles and it was Elaine’s favourite spot. It was only 60 miles away from their home in St Asaph not to far to travel with a new baby.

Colin got up and opened a can of well deserve beer, sat on the edge of the bed flicking through the channels on the TV, nothing on as usual. Some people envied Colin’s life of travel and hotels, the chance to see the country they would say. If they had ever done it, they would know it does get boring and lonely. Colin would rather be at home with Elaine and the children, keeping himself out of trouble he thought grimly.

An image of a tall woman with dark hair came into his mind, very sexy, curves in all the right places which she knew how to use to her advantage. Colin cursed the image and tried to banish it from his mind. This woman was trouble with a capital T and Colin knew it. He had lived to roué the day or night rather, when about four months ago he had stopped over in Stoke. He had gone to a club to pass the time away as usual there was nothing on TV and he was going stir crazy in hotel rooms, he longed to be home cuddled up to Elaine feeling their baby kicking away in her stomach.

He had finished early that Thursday and his meeting the next day, was not till 2pm so with time on his hands he had decided to go for a walk and have a quick drink in a pub. He wished he had found a pub that night, instead he wandered into a club, it was fairly quiet, not surprising for a week night, so he decided to stay put and buy a drink there. He ordered a larger and a whiskey chaser, what the hell, push the boat out. He remembered thinking about his wife and Sam; so far away from him at home and wishing he was there. He nursed his pint, looking at the bottom of the glass. He was that engrossed in his thoughts he didn’t feel the tap on his shoulder at first, but they tapped again until startled he turned around and saw the woman standing there.

At thirty two, Susan was confident and self assured. She knew men found her attractive, and courted their attention, but she had never been married, for some reason she couldn’t seem to hold on to a boyfriend and had been out with most of the regulars that frequented the club. Susan was definitely no angel. She had seen Colin walk in a face she had never seen before instantly aroused her interest, maybe he is the ‘one’ she though, he was certainly attractive, tall, dark with a good body, casually dressed in jeans with a black jacket and navy shirt underneath. Susan watched him walk to the bar, he didn’t turn round and look around the club, eyeing up the woman, like most men did, and he just leant against the bar and ordered his drink, his back towards the club. Nice bum too, Susan though admiringly.

Susan looked around the club to see if anyone else was taking an interest in the man at the bar, there were a couple of woman standing by a table near the dance floor chatting. Susan had seen these two before, they came into the club quite often, quite a few of the regulars gave them attention, but all they seem to do was have a laugh and enjoy the dancing, she had never seen them go home with anyone, no threat there Susan decided.

There was a table full of woman over in the far corner, but these were a lot older than Susan and the man at the bar, Susan’s glance went over them without even hesitating to analyse on whether or not they were a threat to her gaining the attention of the man at the bar. All in all a very quiet night in the club, it hadn’t really got going yet as it was only nine o’clock, but quiet all the same. The Hotsy wasn’t so hot tonight though Susan smiling to herself.

The Hotsy was only a small club in the centre of Stoke, catering for a mixed age range, dimly lit, with two long bars running either side of its width and a small dance floor, covering about a third of the length of the club, surrounded by a combination of low small round beech topped tables with chairs and narrow above waist high black boxes, which people stood next to and were able to put their drinks on the top, with the DJ in a box in the corner and a couple of bouncers walking round in their black suits and white shirts. There wasn’t really any need for the bouncers as there was never any trouble but it was a legal requirement which the club had to comply with. It was always quiet on a Thursday night, livening up on a Friday and Saturday. It had its fair share of regulars which Susan was one. She usually came in on a Thursday and Saturday and usually unaccompanied, she didn’t seem to have many female friends, but the men were always around her, like bees around a honey pot and it wasn’t often that Susan went home alone.

Susan looked back at the man at the bar; he was knocking back a chaser then took a long swallow of the amber liquid in his glass. She bidden her time, waited till the man had drunk most of his pint, sipping her vodka and coke, which she had brought earlier, making the quarter of a glass last until the man had nearly finished his pint. The man was looking into his glass, probably making his mind up whether or not to buy another, drink its time thought Susan standing up, glancing in the mirror wall on the opposite side of the club to ensure that her hair didn’t need attention and to reassure herself, she was indeed the only available sexy woman in the club tonight. Taking a cigarette out of the packet on the table and putting her lighter in her bag, she walked slowly over to the man at the bar and tapped him on his shoulder. It took the second tap and an excuse me before the man turned around.

Colin looked questioningly at the woman in front of him. “Excuse me have you got a light by any chance?”

Colin shook his head, “Sorry I don’t smoke.”

Bugger though Susan, “oh well, could you ask the bar man for me please, I feel uncomfortable asking him, not used to coming into clubs on my own, but a friend I was supposed to meet hasn’t turned up”. Susan lied.

Colin obligingly turned toward the bar with a slight nod in Susan’s direction and raised his hand to attract the attention of the bar man.

“Thanks”, said Susan, “Have you been here before?”

No, I am here on business staying in a hotel up the road. I was bored and decided to come out for a walk and a quick pint, ended up here.”

Must be lonely by yourself, I think I would be bored too, just as well for me you did come in, otherwise I wouldn’t be sitting over there trying to pluck up courage to come to the bar and ask for a light. Susan put on her brightest smile for Colin’s benefit and introduced herself. She held her hand out towards Colin.

The barman had at last finished serving and had come over towards Colin with a friendly “ what can I get you, another larger?” he asked remembering Colin’s previous order.

Without thinking Colin said yes to the pint and requested a light for the ladies cigarette, then feeling a bit awkward and worrying that not to offer a drink would seem ill-mannered he turned to Susan again and asked if she would like a drink, which of course Susan accepted.

Drink in hand and smoking her cigarette Susan stood chatting to Colin. After the second pint Colin had noticed Susan’s curves, trying not to look at the v of the low cut top she was wearing which showed the mounds of the breasts. She was different from Elaine, but still sexy none the less, a bit of a tart as well Colin suspected, and he wasn’t as innocent as Susan took him for. He was well aware she was chatting him up; flattered too, it was nice to know he still had it and this was more entertaining than sitting in an empty hotel room, after all they were only chatting what harm it can do.

Famous last words though Colin, how stupid he had been that night. One drink led to another and before he knew it the club was closing and he was worse for the wear to put it mildly. He vaguely remembered Susan talking about getting a taxi and if she could ring for a taxi at his hotel, which of course stupidly he agreed too.

The next morning Colin woke to find Susan sleeping next to him, both of them completely naked. Colin had never got out of bed so quick in all his life; he practically ran to the bathroom, shut the door and leant heavily against it, head pounding after having too much to drink the night before. He could see the Panic on his face in the small mirror over the sink which faced the door. What have I done, what the hell have I done? What have I gotten myself into and more important how am I going to get out of it. He knew he had to get rid of the woman quick!! Not only out of his bed and hotel room, but out of his life. If Elaine found out about this that would be the end, she would be mortified and rightly so. Elaine trusted him and he trusted Elaine that was why he was able to do this job with peace of mind, he knew Elaine would always be at home waiting for him.

Colin smiled to himself, sitting on his bed as he remembered the almost comical rush to get Susan out of that hotel room, as if he though Elaine could see straight into the room and see her in his bed, it took him an whole hour, with excuses that he would be late for a meeting before he finally got rid of her, even then, she insisted on writing her number on the hotel’s courtesy paper, which Colin had ripped up and put into the bin as soon as she left.

But with a sigh, he acknowledged that it hadn’t been so easy to get Susan out of his life. He wished it had been, wished that had been the end of it, a one night stand, his one mistake. He had never been unfaithful to Elaine before, but that wasn’t the end of Susan, Susan had made sure of that and guiltily Colin realised that most of the time he had been a willing participant. Even after avoiding Elaine’s eyes when he got home that whole weekend, thinking somehow she would be able to read the betrayal in his eyes, but of course she hadn’t and a small part of him almost wished she had, and then the affair wouldn’t have carried on.

He loved Elaine with all his heart, he loved his children; he didn’t want to loose Elaine, he didn’t want Sam and Toni to grow up with a part time farther like he had done. It was just as well he couldn’t make it to Stoke this week and he had been trying to avoid staying in Stoke for the last three months, but more often than not he had ended up staying in Stoke because of the way his work was scheduled. Colin got up off the bed, grimacing with disgust at his own weakness and went into the bathroom for a shower.

After a shower and a meal downstairs in the hotel dinning room, Colin wandered to the small bar for a quick pint before attacking some paper work and turning in for bed, he had learn his lesson, no more going into clubs for him, one mistress was enough, in fact it was one too many!

After that initial night together Colin seemed to be sent to Stoke more and more often, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t avoid it, he still ended up there and because the firm booked the hotel it was always the same one he stayed at. Easily found, too easy he though grimly. Hell who was he trying to kid, if he had really wanted to he could have put his foot down, he had given up trying to analyze why he hadn’t, because it was easier not to he supposed. Colin had always tried to avoid confrontation, tried to take the easy way out It was easier after the first few failed attempts by Susan to entice him out of the hotel back into the club where he had met her to say, ‘yes ok he would go!’ On the third time she accidentally on purpose managed to bump into him in the reception area of his hotel and tried to wheedle him into going, she had just worn him down, plain and simple. She was persistent if nothing else, he had to say that for her.

That time he had been determined nothing untoward would go on, but she had literally thrown herself at him , handed it to him on a plate, she had flirted outrageously and he was a man after all far away from home, apart for the slip up with Susan he had never been unfaithful to Elaine never! And in all the years he had known Elaine he never thought he would have been.

It must have been about 8 years ago when he met Elaine, he had literally bumped into her, a petite blonde who at 17 years old was rushing round a corner and bumped in to him with a bang so hard it knocked her off her feet. Colin was full of apologies convinced it must have been his fault not looking or thinking where he was going, his mind elsewhere as usual. It wasn’t until much later he learnt that Elaine always rushed, she never did anything at a sedate pace, always ran around as if there was no tomorrow and it wasn’t surprising that she bumped into him at the speed she always walked, but back then he didn’t know. When he had helped Elaine pick up the shopping she was getting for her mother and once the packages were safely back in their carrier bag, Colin looked down into the most liquid blue eyes he had ever seen, it was as if he could fall into them, they seemed that deep He was sure he held his breath, but if he did Elaine didn’t seem to notice, he knew there and then he wanted to know this whirling dervish more, much, much more.

Colin smiled as he nursed his pint, he had managed to persuade Elaine to go for a drink as an apology for knocking her over, him knock her over, the way she came rushing round that corner she could have knocked over a whole battalion of grenadier guards, but it worked she said yes and the following year was the happiest Colin had ever known and he married her a year later, knowing full well he would never love anyone like he loved Elaine.

So what the hell was he doing with Susan, god he must be mad!!! Colin practically banged his pint glass on the bar startling the bar man who hurried over to enquire if he wanted another. He was that angry with himself. Why on earth did he feel flattered by Susan’s attention that night, so much so once again they ended up in bed together! God knows, after that it seemed easy to go along with whatever Susan suggested, what the hell other men get away with a fling why couldn’t he. He knew why he couldn’t; it was getting him down, he felt dragged down by the weight of it. All the deceit, pretending all was great with the world when he knew it wasn’t. To top it all Susan was talking about setting up house together, setting up house I ask you, how on earth he can do that, a married man!! Susan knew he had been more honest with Susan, more than he had been with his own wife. She knew he was married, knew he had kids, he had even told her he loved Elaine. She had just laughed at him, ‘what are you doing here then boyo, with little old me!!’ Why are you cheating on the poor cow?

Why indeed, though Colin as he looked into the bottom of another empty glass, he was even drinking too much, usually he would have a pint after work if it had been a hard day just to relax so the he could wind down and be ready for bed, but more often than not it would be three or four pints a night now. He had to get rid of Susan, tell her all of this nonsense would have to stop, setting up house indeed. Colin got up place the glass deliberately on the bar, turn on his heel and marched quickly across the small lounge area and out of the door, leaving the bemused bar man to wonder what sort of day that customer had had to look so annoyed one minute and depressed the next.

Colin went straight to his room threw his cloths on the chair and climbed into bed, exhausted after a fraught day and trying to figure out unsuccessfully what to do to get himself out of the situation he found himself.

TO BE CONTINUED .......DEPENDING ON THE COMMENTS.